Saturday, December 22, 2007

you call this snow?

Been here long enough to know this ain't snow ... hit me with the real stuff!

Friday, December 21, 2007

All in all, I'd rather be in Philadelphia ...

Holidays in Minnesota are a strange affair when you're not from there.

There is a social phenomenon in this state called "Minnesota Nice" - which means the natives (them) are very cordial and outgoing but incredibly superficial and guarded to the transplants (me).

So, while they'll say "hi" and ask how you're doing, they really don't care. In fact, if you don't give the appropriate non-committal glib answer in a funny colloquialism (e.g. "just dandy, Fred, thanks for asking!"), they often stop, frown and move on shaking their heads like you were the retarded offspring a diseased monkey. While you may be concerned about your sick dog and the new rash your kid developed - for some reason, this is way to much information for most Minnesotans.

Back on the east coast, this exchange is a chance to vent and have a little friendly competition with an acquaintance - or better yet, that guy sitting next to you on the bus. It's like therapy, but cheaper with less social stigma.

Around the holidays in the northstar state, the "nice-ness" kicks it up a notch - people smile, hold doors for each other, exchange inane banter all in the name of holiday cheer. For god sakes, we actually had a bunch of employees at my work caroling in the lobby at lunch hour!

However, the silo-ing also kicks up a notch as well. The natives will stop by and wish us transplants "happy holidays", but innocently ask them what they're doing for the holidays and it's treated like a veiled invitation request. There's a lot of sputtering and elaborate explanations ("yeah, it's a small house ... we barely have room for all the kids, they eat on the folding card table in the living room").

The funny part is that 99% of the time, I don't want to be invited to these affairs. Besides the whole "nice" thing, Minnesotans are well ... not really that nice. It's kind of weird.

However ... if anyone wants to invite me and my family to their lake cabin this summer for some boating, drinking and barbecuing, then ... by golly, you all are the nicest people I've ever met.

Happy holidays. Peace